Think of a phrase that contains ...

... the words "booze-up" and "brewery" - and we aren't talking about the Open University Students' Association either!

Yes, I thought that incompetence at its most stunning inefficiency could only be reached in the hands of that august body but I am fast changing my opinion. I have been reliably informed by one of my "moles on various committees" that this week's radio programme was the one for the 1st week of March - the radio station appears to have thrown the wrong version onto the cutting room floor and gone with the one we discarded which is now 5 weeks out of date.

And that isn't all either. I've been given a task to undertake by the footy club which requires them to send in a form. So I've been waiting 3 weeks and it's not made it there yet. I obtained a duplicate and I rang up the President of the club about completing it - the deadline is Friday - but I got the answerphone so I left a message.

No callback by the time I went to training, so never mind - I'll see the President's son down at the ground. But down at the ground there were just 4 of us, and we were locked out of thestadium. It appears that the trainer has given the players the night off so that they can watch the footy on the box.

Unbelievable, isn't it? Last Wednesday they were rained off; last Friday was someone's birthday; today there's something better on the box. And all the teams are struggling right now and need a change of fortune. Fitness is a big issue with the teams - watch them drop off the pace in the last 15 minutes - but the trainer cancels the training session. Stand by for a right spannering on Saturday and Sunday.

I did a couple of laps around the field and then came home. The President eventually rang me back at 21:00 and I explained the situation. "I'll ring up the secretary right now and call you straight back". It's now 02:30 and guess what?

But it's not all doom and gloom. You remember my action photo from the footy 10 days ago? Well the local rag has published it. It might only be La Montagne but it's still nice to see my name in lights and it's another addition to the portfolio. And Claude came back from his holiday in the Midi so we had coffee on the terrasse. We could do that because there was a moment when the rain stopped. After me crowing about the good weather yesterday it p155ed down for most of the day. But in between the showers I dug out a few more treestumps and tomorrow morning I'll be starting to build the new megacloche. The afternoon will be spent at a talk on the history of the area of La Cellette. Marianne wants me to meet the organiser.

And 02:30 in the morning? This 3D program has taken hold of me. My two characters have now made it to the beach with a herd of wild rhinocerous hot on their heels. I shall be scanning the world-wide web tomorrow evening to see if I can find a freeware boat otherwise my little animation will come to a premature end.