Tuesday, January 1, 2013

A Happy New Year ...

... to all my readers.

A heartfelt plea of course, but not from my heart, but from the heart of whoever it was who was responsible for all of the "artwork" on the walls of the Gentlemen's Rest Room on Crewe Bus Station back in the 1960s. I remember all of the artwork so well, being an impressionable young lad back in those days and I owe my magnificent Grade 2 'O'Level pass in Biology back in 1970 not to the teachers who helped teach the course, but to whoever it was who was responsible for the drawings in the aforementioned.

My success in the poetry syllabus of the English Literature 'O' Level I also put down very much to the efforts of whoever it was who was responsible for the text of the illustrations. Who can forget the heartfelt cry of
"It's no good standing on the seat
 The crabs in here can jump six feet
 And if you think that that is high
 Go next door - the b@$t@rd$ fly"?

Move over, Tennyson. Which reminds me - my poetry teacher, Mr Simpson, once asked me "will you read a short extract from Alfred Tennyson?"
To which I replied "Certainly sir. 'Fred Tennys'"

But back to the gentlemen's rest room. I also remember the heartfelt wail of
"Here I sit, broken hearted;
 Spent my penny but only f@rted"
and considered that it wasn't a patch on my own juvenile retort of
"Broken hearted, here I sit
 went to f@rt, had a $h|t"

And that also reminds me of another extract from days of yore when Alan Fearon once shouted out "I'm going for a $h|t"
to which I immediately retorted "you leave my brother alone!"

But enough of the misplaced humour for now. After two days of doing nothing at all and a third one coming right up tomorrow, I do sincerely wish you all a very happy 2013, and I wish for all of you in the coming year everything that you wished for everyone else in 2012.

Best wishes to all of you.


  1. I worry about that poet you know! He even made it up to Yorkshire. Why would that make me worry you may ask? Well... it was the ladies loos!

  2. Swansea University went green in the 1990s what with all the recycling initiatives. On the walls of the men's throne room was written: "Flush twice, it's a long way to the refectory".